For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
