yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
