I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
