if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
