he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize