google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Randomize