so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
