So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
