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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
