It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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