We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Randomize
