I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
