Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
It's never too late to be topless.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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