Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
