hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
