I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize