I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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