dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
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