he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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