Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
