Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
