I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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