my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
