Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
