then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
