It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
