Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
