I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
