Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
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