Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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