Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
