I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
