My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Do you have feelings for this penis?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
