Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I have fence marks all over my body
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
