So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
