wakey wakey hands off snakey
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
