i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
