Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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