About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
