She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
