How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
