i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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