she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
