I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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