For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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