So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize