She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
