went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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