Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
