I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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