He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
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